I loathe and pity my own parents, at the same time. They have to be some of the unhappiest people I've ever met, but it's of their doing, and they've done their damnedest to pass that hatred and bitterness onto me too. The ones closest to us can hurts us the worst by far. The only true way to deal with it seems to be some mixture of forgiveness and separation, neither of which I seem to be able to entirely manage. :v Sorry to hear.