Hiatus News
First post: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/42793188/
I think it's a good time for an update since a number of things have happened since I started my break. I have an anxiety that turns into a crazy paranioa, the kind of paranoia where my mind can even create fake pain that doesn't really exist. I often can't tell when I am really in trouble or its just something made up. Usually I can manage it well myself by gong through a few things to tell my brain its all better, but I've had so much bad things happen all at once in life real fast after one another that I got stuck into a loop of "You are dying. People are following you. Are those gunshots or fireworks? Your leg is broken. Your arm can't heal. You are dying. Is someone outside?" and every single thing I did turned into a Tv-channel-flipping thought even if it was just opening the fridge.

I had to go to the doctors for sure. I couldn't sleep because I was afraid to sleep, I was starting to get dizzy every time it started, I was barfing from the sheer panic from me shaking. And so here I am now, on a new set of medication for the first time in a few years. Things have calmed down quite a lot. I can hear myself think. I actually have slept for 5 days in a row like normal. (oh but also holy tatertots the medicine made me crazy dizzy for the first 5 days).

But, I still want to be on break. It's only been about a week or so, so I still need to make sure everything is okay. It looks like that between all the fake pain I was having, I really do have something wrong with my leg. Huh. This is frustrating. Gotta deal with that now.

YCHs NEWS
So, even though I'm taking a break, eventually I'm going to need to reopen or i will be unable to pay for things. I'm thinking that I will do YCHs to prevent as much stress as possible for the time being. I am currently not open for them, but I most likely will next month. I think I want to make a few new ones, too. Maybe. My mind is a tad empty at the moment still. It's trying to fill back up from all the emptying I just did of it. We'll see how This Rolls.

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