I have recently come back from Midwest Furfest 2018. It was the very first time in my life that I actually spent time overnight outside of my state of origin, without the company of my family. The experience I had at the convention made me realize a lot of things about myself:

• I have a very extreme difficulty with expressing myself. My difficulty of self-expression is not limited to simply restraining myself from saying negative feelings, but also neutral and positive feelings as well. The reason that I think I feel compelled to restrain my expressions, is because of anxiety that I have for the consequences of what releasing my expressions would have.
• I have difficulties with leadership. While at the convention, I struggled to make executive decisions on what to do at what times, and more often than not, found myself wandering just trying to figure out what I should do.
• While venturing outside of the state, I learned just how much I took the internet for granted. I really missed everyone, and not being able to actively speak to them made me very lonely.

With these subjects in mind, It's my goal to try to be less reclusive, make better plans for myself, and ensure that I am creating a community in which as many people as possible feel comfortable with each other. I don't really have any idea how I'm going to do that now, but I feel at the very least, working past the shame I have for my own creations will at least help others do the same for themselves.