I am having such a hard time now. Why? Let me explain it then! Please note, I might get worked up while writing this, which is probably why you shouldn't read it. Because chances are it may end up like a journal that you'll have a hard time taking seriously.
I mentioned Australia in the title. Here's why. Me and my family are moving. That's right. We are moving from the Pacific Northwestern United States, approximately 7,700 miles across the pacific ocean, all the way to New South Wales Australia. But unfortunately, we can't do that within about six months. I mean, we already got out visas, but we probably can't move until around the end of July or the beginning of August. And that is because of our family dog.
He is an adorable Six year old Golden Retriever, and his name is "Shadow." I've had him since I was in third grade, and he was just a little puppy at the time. Unfortunately Australian laws are so gosh darn strict about transporting pets into their country that it just makes me so bloody mad! You see we had to get him continuously vaccinated, and we've had to get his blood tested because the Aussies are too afraid of having a rabies outbreak within their country. Their country doesn't really have rabies actually, so they are extremely careful about allowing foreign diseases into their country because they know that it could potentially mess up the eco-system.
But it's because of that that we have to give our dog a rabies vaccination, and for some reason we have to wait six months until we can see if it worked. Why? Because apparently it takes about six months for rabies to even manifest in a dog. And this vaccination is the only way that we can prove for a fact to the Aussies that he is clear of rabies. But because of that period of time, my parents have considered the possibility of re-homing him. Basically by finding a family that we can trust and allowing him for this family to adopt him and leaving him behind in the U.S. But that would mean that when we'd move to Australia, I will never see or be able to touch my dog ever again.
Of course both of my parents are against the idea. But if we decide to keep him and take him with us, that would mean that while my Dad stays in Sydney trying to find an apartment and sorting everything out with his new job, me and my Mom have to stay here in America and prepare to sell our house and all of our furniture for good, all the while we stay separated overseas for a total of Six months. All because the Aussies are too strict and dramatic and can't even let our dog through just yet because they are afraid he could be rabid. Although we all know the chances of this are extremely low, they just don't care.
Seriously, I am done with this. During the conversation we had less than an hour ago, we were all getting worked up and I wasn't making the situation any better. Than again, neither were my parents. My mother is suddenly being stupid and over dramatic about "How she failed me as a mother" and "How she sheltered me too much that I can't handle anything" and "How everything is her fault and its the end of the world and everything is agony blah blah blah blah" Just... freaking... stop it! Shut up! Shut the hell up.
I know I'm probably going to regret all of this later. I wish I had someone to talk to. I wish I had a friend that I could talk to about all this and that could help me through it. But I have none. One of the reasons why I came onto this site was to find someone who could be a potential friend, but now I see that is not going to happen so easily. I wish I didn't have to deal with this on my own, and that's what makes me so stressed. This is why I haven't found the opportunity to upload anything online, because so many things have been distracting me and I just need a break from everything. And I need a break from myself.
I'm sorry about all this. I know I should probably delete this. I am going to keep this up for about a day. If this suddenly gets too much negative reaction, I'll just delete it and pretend I didn't post any of it. I wish I could properly explain everything but it would take forever. And It is also around 11:30 right now as I type this. And the last thing I want is to make a journal that is too long.
So I'll say this, I'm sorry for all the angst that I just typed out. I'm sorry if an Australian reads this and feels disrespected by this journal. I have nothing against people who live in Australia. I am just upset about how long this whole process is going to take and how I wish it could be shortened in some way. But that will never happen.
And I'm sorry that this journal is so disorganized. I am not used to writing extremely long journals that go a bit further into my personal life. I know my grammar sucks ass, and so does my typing. This is another reason why I'm probably going to delete it. I know there are probably worse journals than mine, but I'm worried that I'll get kicked off the site by the developers because of this journal. I don't recall typing anything heavily inappropriate, but if they want me to delete it, I will.
Anyways, It's as simple as that. I'm having a bit of a hard time right now. I just wish that I had someone who I knew I could talk to or send messages to when I feel stressed or lonely. But as said earlier, I guess I only have myself and my parents to help me with this whole situation. So yeah. I hope that whoever reads this just pretends that this journal doesn't exist. With all this disorganized gibberish that adults like to call angst, I doubt anyone will take me seriously anyway.
So I have nothing left to say other than see you later I guess. If anything else happens I may write it down again. But until then, I'll be working on more projects to submit here soon.
6 February 2018 at 00:44:25 MST